FASHION TIPS!!!!!!! READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!!

Hahahahahahahha. The very title wants me to laugh because the last person you should come to for fashion tips is me! TIPS technically means to insure prompt service but after my tips it will become to initiate prompt slaps... Not me, yourself!!

Anyway back to fashion.. I've been going shopping from the past two weeks (ok last sunday and today, still technically I feel as tired as if I have been shopping everyday!!) Anyway my shopping sprees were a big flop show. I really went with the idea to shop till I drop. Here are a few reasons why I didn't...

1. I am sick and tired of seeing the tie-me-up here and there tops. We wear stitched tops. Why the hell do I need a patch of cloth hanging around as if the top would drop...

2. Throw the anarkali tops. If you must keep them, stitch them properly!! The same line near the chest with one umbrella bottom! It doesn't rain in Chennai!

3. WHY the hell is glitter needed for all tops??? Even formal shirts?? And WHY does the thread poke so much? 2 points down for this one no comfort, blindness causing!!

4. Next coming to tunics... There are sub categories for this since tunics are my favourite

a. Place pockets in appropriate places, not weird places!! (DUH)

b. The buttons needn't be blindening (That word can now be added in the Webster dictionary)

c. NEED NOT HAVE A BELT OR A LAADI!!!

5. Shirts - Why are they so badly stitched? Puff sleeves for shirts? Do I look like Little Miss Muffet to you??

6. Kurtas - WHY glitter?? Whatever happened to embroidery?? Or just make the damn things plain! And one more problem with Kurtas - sleeve size.. TOO long / TOO short!!

7. Harem pants - Let me just ignore they exist.

8. Leggings - Leggings are good if they are made of the right fabric with the right sizes.. Otherwise I'll have to use them as christmas stockings!! HO HO HO!

9. Jeans with embroidery: Please!!! Why embroider jeans? Denim is the best fabric ever. Why spoil its classic look? And what's with bell bottoms?? I'm not going to sing naino mein sapna...

10. Hipsters: This one's censored - All I can say is how much lower??

11. Lace on shirts - Three problems

a. I'm not an english butler

b. I'm not going to be on the cover of any magazine like you know what!!

c. Shoe lace is better!!!

12. Skirts - Too long or too short! too girly or too straight! I need to walk...you know with out the danger of tears... And the girly ones?? They flare... Lesser said the better

13. Stoles - They've really got to be stolen from all shops. That's all I want to say!!

14. Waist coats: Personally I love these... But why are they made of wool in Chennai?? And why the devil don't they come till the waist???

15. Belts - I don't believe in violence, but even with all the jhang (buckles, GLITTER, etc) .. I can see enough to belt anyone...

Ok, by now you know I'm never going to open a boutique, because I guess this is what sells, otherwise why would ALL shops have the SAME stuff??

If you agree with ANY of the above, tell me where you shop... I'll be thankful to you!!

About connections and more...

The Connection to my office A/C conked off!! Naa this post is not about that connection... Ok bad start. I can't even delete that!! Anyway have you noticed how we just hit it off with some people? I mean I have never understood movies when people come and say "Will you be friends?" and shake hands. Is friendship a planned thing? You just take a liking to ppl right? At least I do...

I have recently started talking to one of my childhood best friends. She and I were neighbours. I was three and a half back then and I still remember! I spoke to her in Tamil and she spoke in Kannada, but in spite of language problems we became inseparable siamese twins. Even today we can just talk about anything. That day when we were chatting after a really long time I was surprised how both of us could still ramble on!!

I laugh when I think about this one... A classmate had told me she was a snob and a bore. And I actually went and confronted that girl asking her why the other girl said that!! Ok, they fought (What? I have always been straight forward!!) but a new friendship was born!! We are like chalk and cheese and have nothing in common. But who said you need to to be friends??

Sometimes you take a liking to someone naturally but have no idea how to say "mujhse dosti karoge?" She was new in school, so I asked her "How do you like this school?" Only to be snapped at "It's my first day here!!" What more could I say?? But we both still laugh abt that (Don't kill me for making you sound like the BAD one here. We both know you aren't!!)

Connections needn't be there from the time you know a person, they can be formed later...It's really weird how sometimes being classmates for so long we never were good friends!! Now we talk for hours together...

Others are there from even before you remember!! I have heard how close we both were. Wish I did remember.. But that doesn't matter since we still are!! They are busy with their lives and studies, but when we do meet, we could almost cause an electrocution!!

Some connections are unexplainable. (I never was good in Electrical subjects but that's not the point here) But still one cannot deny that they are there...

Now let's digress to internet connections (!!) I am not marketing any social site here (!!) Connections do rise from there as well! Stronger than imaginable!! (I am being entirely positive here...) Connecting, disconnecting and more all in my hands. I can just switch off the modem hehehe.. Windows closing is an option... Going invisible is a more polite option... Not if I want to stay connected for a long long time though...

I don't know much about electrical connections... But I have an option to get to know...

How???

My office A/C is getting repaired tomorrow!!

Megz - up, close and personal

This post is proper with title and everything! But it is going to be really short. I am not used to writing about myself. The few ppl who read my blog have asked me why have you never written about yourself? Why do you call yourself megalomaniac? Why do you say arrogance is not good? Why contradict yourself?

Well, because of repeated questions and request for clarifications I have finally decided to come clean. By megalomaniac I mean my world revolves around me. I am self-centred. I am interested in improving myself. I am interested in my dreams, my aspirations, my opinions... But most of all I'm interested in learning. And learning will not come if a 'you' or 'he' or 'she' is not there in my life. But face it, we have people in our lives because we feel good. (Can I generalize) Most often we like those who like us. Right??

Now that I've deviated, let me say something that I very strongly feel. Why do people say "I did that for you!" I ask myself, is that really true? Can I really help someone or do something for someone without expecting anything in return (This is not an extension of my expectations post) Can I? Do I believe in service? In charity? In giving? Unconditionally??? NO! Purely because at the end of the day I do something for my satisfaction. I want to feel good. Let me take a simple example. They say one gets 'punya' giving water to a thirsty person. I obviously want that punya so I serve a thirsty person. Right? Or if I didn't care for things like 'punya' I would do it so that my conscience does not ask me "why didn't you give water to him when you could?" A clear (relatively) conscience is everyone's need right? Now, tell me.. Where did the he/she/you come? I can only see a big 'I' everywhere. In capital letters!!!

Whether it is my thoughts or my feelings or my opinions or my idiosyncracies.. whether it is my relationships or my workmanship or my social life... whether it is issues that make me think or events that have moved me or experiences in my life... what I read or see or hear or feel... Or most of all what I learn... EVERYTHING is about me. Now it is up to you to decide if I'm arrogant ot egoistic or an egotist!! But then again that's your opinion. I respect it. But I can do nothing about it...

"Ashwattama is dead" Isn't this what Yudhishtira told Drona during the war? It was a white lie. But it was this lie which proved to be a blackmark on his honesty... I ask everyone and myself... What is honesty? What is truth? What are lies???

I lie. All the time. They are all white lies. But I still do. Why do I lie? Simple. I don't want to tell the truth. Why don't I want to tell the truth? Simple again, I simply don't. Why? Why? Am I scared? Naaa. I am not scared. There are some things which I believe I needn't tell anyone, so I lie.

What is honesty then? If I lie so much, how did I become honest? I usually lie when I keep someone else's secret. What is a secret? Anything that has been told to me trusting me to keep it to myself is a secret. And to keep someone's trust I'll do anything...

If I don't want to tell people some things and hence I lie about it, what's wrong? Why should some one know everything about me? I'm not deliberately trying to hide anything. Even if I do why do I become the liar???

Lying to hurt, lying to someone you care, lying like a coward are all wrong (What is wrong?)... But lying for a good cause?? (What is good? Oof I ask too many questions!) But, right now, what is good for me is good and vice versa! As for the questions I have raised... I'm yet to find answers...

Never-sent messages to you all...

1. Thank you. To you it was your duty. To me it meant the world...

2. I was domineering and abominable, but still we've been friends. Now we hardly talk, but it's ok...

3. We talked. You told me a lot of things about other people. I shouldn't have listened. I forgot, you could be telling someone else about me...

4. One phone call, just one phone call, things would have been different. Question is who? You or me???

5. It was my problem to have misperceived you. No one else perceived you the way I did. Maybe it was more about how I wanted to see you. Not as you are...

6. One image, one wish, no face, no identity...

7. I would slap you if you came in front of me. That one reprimanding was not enough. Technically I don't slap, but you would be scared out of your wits anyway!!!

8. I have forgiven you completely...

9. If there was a definiton for friend, you'd be it, plain and simple.

10. Illusions break. Hallucinations clear out. Truth comes out.

11. Distance or not. In kilometers or millimeters... Does not matter.

12. Admiral, but purely of knowledge...

13. We've taken the first step. It's just the beginning.

14. I taught you? You taught me!!

15. Connection disconnected.

16. Opposite opinions, but mutual respect for each other.

17. Childhood memories!! Still we recall, together!

18. Connected always!!

19. I love you. Period!

20. Friend? No? Yes? Why? Oh!

21. I've been a total opportunist with you. But still I don't regret it!

22. Thanks, I have become shrewd and smart because of you

23. Connection?? Oh well BSNL!! Or reliance?? Ha ha!

24. CA? Bye!!

25. You are adorable. Seriously.

Great expectations... This was a book by Charles Dickens right? I've never read it (I never liked his tragic stories!) But I can relate a lot to the title. I'm sure all of us can!

Let me start with expectations from a book or a movie. Before that I'd like to go to what builds these expectations?? It is a previous record or a bias or a preconceived notion that leads one to expect, right? Now if I really liked a book by a particular author, it would be obvious that I would expect her/his next book to be much better. That's why the seventh book in the Harry Potter series was a big disappointment. I wanted the magic to live on, but the shallow ending made me want to cringe. Probably if we readers didn't expect so much the series would have probably ended in a different way... But that's a different story altogether!

It is ok to expect from a book or a movie. It's after all someone's work and money goes into it... But is it ok to expect from someone on a personal level? More importantly, can I say that I won't expect anything from you? I have tried to follow what I call no expectation theory...

First I started thinking like an extremist. (Obviously before that I thought that I had all the right to expect, I was domineering and imposing!!!) Anyway I said to myself one fine day "No more expectation from anyone!" Stupid decision! Moreso because one can't live in relationships that way!! I mean how is my own mother supposed to know how I felt? Was she supposed to read my mind? (!!) But, stubborn and adamant that I was I continued to follow this... This meant no communicating feelings, just keeping quiet even if I was burning within (!!) But nevertheless I'd show my irritation, which could be more frustrating to others!!

After I could take that no more, I thought... How the hell was this no expectation theory helping me? I was just giving more room for miscommunication. And in the process I was feeling miserable. So I took my theory to level 2... It is ok to expect from people I'm close to. But no expectations from others... That brought me to the question: what if new people became close to me? Was I suddenly supposed to start expecting? And vice versa??? And since I believed in giving space to people, how much space was the right amount? I hate being a chipkoo, I'll never tell anyone if I feel neglected. I don't want to be called attention craving!! Or a crib pot!! At the same time I want to be frank! ...

Now my no expectation theory has reduced to this: I don't believe in one good turn deserves another. I mean I don't do something expecting anything in return! Nor do I impose my ideas on others!! Or expect others to listen to my opinion! But I do expect a connection with people I'm close to. Actually I needn't expect it, it just comes. But my over expectation from myself of not expecting from others making it difficult for others to expect to understand me is not there!!!! Confused? Oh why bother? After all I don't expect you to understand this, but if you connect to me, you will...

Radical Thoughts - 1 (Please read with an OPEN and BROAD mind...)

Yes, I am in a 'pravachan'ic mood! And I can feel that urge to type everything that's there in my mind... (If I do that, I might get into trouble. So for more 'radical' explanations just mail me!) Religion, spirituality, morals, culture, good and bad, duty, dharma, faith, devotion... These are the words which are flashing in my mind right now. People's definitons, my definitions, my views, my arguments, oof too many things at a time... (going to be looooong -will post it in several parts)

Ok, where do I start? Let me start with the story of Dhruva, the boy who became the pole star. Even as a child I used to disagree with the fact that the child was great. I mean the kid performed penance to seek vengeance from his step mother and brother who pushed him away from his father's lap. I would ask, revenge is wrong... Even if he does perform penance, is it good to be avengeful? Will God like such a boy? Doesn't God expect us to forgive and forget? And in the end when the boy's 'devotion' is rewarded, I used to get confused all the more!!

I have always questioned 'penance'. Because in all mythological stories, there is 'fruit' for penance. And God becomes pleased with such 'devotees' who have come to Him for a reason. Whatever happened to unconditional love? Even here it was like, you give something you get something, which is human! (Yes, I know some devotees used to trouble God with penance, I can say that from illustrations in Amar Chitra Katha and the Sagars' mythological serials... The earth rumbles, there is thunder and Lo Behold!!) Anyway, my point is, why call it devotion when you have some expectation out of it? I used to dislike Kalidasa for the same reason. Here in this story, 'devotion' was demeaned further because, Kalidasa used cheap means of blackmail to become 'learned'! But my questions were unanswered...

My favourite stories of devotion have always been that of Ekalavya, Prahlada and Nachiketa. Nachiketa's story was beautiful... Nachiketa is 'sacrificed' to Lord Yama by his father in a fit of anger, but Nachiketa just goes since he is devoted to his father! Ekalavya... I'm yet to understand how someone could behave that way...Prahlada could see God everywhere, but sometimes I can't help but wonder if he would still love God if God hadn't saved him...

That brings me to 'faith' and 'belief'. How can I explain faith? Is it trust? Going to a story again... That of Markandeya this time (I used to and still hate the fact that Lord Yama is the villain in most of these stories. He is the epitome of Dharma! More on that later!) Would Markandeya have faith in God, if he hadn't saved his life? No. I don't know about Markandeya, but the story wouldn't have become famous!! Coming back to day to day life... We say I have faith in God. He will not let us down. By saying the second sentence aren't we contradicting the fact that we say that we have faith?? Then what is faith?

The only answer that I can give to my own question (strictly MY opinion): having complete faith is believing in myself. Irrespective of whether or not I get let down. If I don't, great! But if I do? I have enough strength in me to keep going, to face anything and learn from it... Whoa all this sounds great on paper (technically monitor!) But to practice it is almost impossible! But I can still give it a try!! I hope...

Anyway, I'd like to end this article with a justification. These are my thoughts. Spirituality for me is what I'm within, what I believe, what I learn from... Religion for me is practices that other people believe and something I don't comment about, but totally respect. Both are very personal and each person has her/his own thoughts... Do feel free to comment and tell me what you feel!